December 13, 2006 8:39 AM PST

All I want for Christmas is a PSP viral-marketing campaign

This is simply sad. Alliwantforxmasisapsp.com is one of the most transparent and pathetic examples of viral marketing the Internet has seen, and that's being nice about it. This thinly veiled commercial in the form of a blog chronicles two target-demographic hipster tweens named "Charlie" and "Jeremy" in their quest to get a PSP for Christmas. In reality, the site is a blatant and cringe-worthy ploy developed by Zipatoni, a marketing company that seems to be experiencing a dearth of actual talent.

With all the style of a sitcom dad trying to seem cool to his kids, this site has it all, complete with text messaging misspellings and overuse of words like "nxt" and "beatz." The just-slightly-too-slick "please buy me a PSP, mom!" fliers are bad enough, but what really brings this festival of terror together is the rap by "Cousin Pete". Cousin Pete is a 30-something teenager who rhymes like Kevin Federline and dances around in a hip basement living room that just happens to look like a rented warehouse turned into a soundstage. Watch at your own peril.

For more information on this masterpiece of marketing malfeasance, check out Joystiq's and Kotaku's stories on it. Meanwhile, I'll be taking a very long shower to get the pathetic off of me.

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